“Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand”. (Isaiah 41:10)
Two days ago, while in a kick boxing class the inspiration to pour my heart out on this subject came without a warning. I had been on a healthy work out routine for the last 5 months and I have been enjoying it so much. However, on that day I really felt like giving up. On that day I found out that I gained 5 pounds, I was exhausted, unhappy and the words: “Give up! This is not for you! You were never meant to stick with this!” were constantly nudging in my brain. Regardless, I somehow managed to get my 3 children in a car while spilling snacks, getting my hair pulled out and forgetting my water bottle…it was raining hard, there was no parking at the gym, kids were loud and the headache was unavoidable… I began to question my purpose behind my decision to go to the gym on that day. I guess I just looking for something that would snap me out of this “tired mom mode” and get me into better mood. I finally made it after changing a dirty diaper, comforting my one year old and smiling at a teenage girl that was chatting with me about something. I made it, but I was at least 10 minutes late… I awkwardly found a spot in an over filled class and the feeling of ” I don’t belong here” was really strong…
The whole class I was exhausted and uncomfortable, I could not look at myself in the mirror, I was disappointed. I truly felt like I took 10 steps back and I do not have an energy to keep going forward… As the class went on, I reflected on multiple times in my life when I was in a similar situation. This feeling and these thoughts were so familiar to me:
It was when I planned 5 years in a row to finish a yearly bible reading challenge, just to give up on day 7! It was when I bought new running shoes and only took 1 jog in them. It was when I decided that I will read a bed time story to my children every night, just to give up after the first one. It was multiple attempts at learning to be patient and organized. It is always, when I strive to have a clean house, home cooked meals and folded laundry… It was also when I dreamed about something, just to tell myself that this dream is too big for you…
This list can go on for days…but I think you get the picture. I think at this point you can relate, at this point you are feeling that knot in your throat over the things that you took 10 steps back on…things, dreams, goals, desires that are thrown over your shoulder and are still waiting to be accomplished.
Some of us are there now, some of us have been there, some of us will be there – but it is what are we going to do once we realize that our goals are not going to meet themselves is what will bring momentum to finish! See, I am a person that loves to take first steps, it is easy for me, thrilling, and exiting. It is the second step that is problematic for me…I never know if it will move me forward or backward.
Two days ago the picture was clear for me, in order to continuously move forward, I must always put myself outside of my comfort zone. I must move through fear, weakness, doubt, and “change of heart”.
I must also give myself grace to pick up where I left off, regardless of how much time had passed and how far away I am from my goal. God is the author of Grace – it is a beautiful thing! Living a life of Grace is so freeing! You have Grace, for every day, for every situation – just accept it and move forward!
If there is still a burning desire in you to finish what you once have started it is a big sign to start taking small steps forward. You will never reach your goals by giving up, but you will reach them if you choose to take a step forward every once in a while, regardless of the circumstances. You will find out that each time it gets easier, each time you get closer and stronger. This is how you accomplish things in life, its simple but not easy. You must move forward!
Today I want to ask you – please, do not give up on your dreams. Re-set you goals and begin moving towards them. I guarantee you, very soon you will see such change! Still waters often begin to flourish with bacteria and odor, moving waters bring life! Choose to move forward today and always! You are a masterpiece and nothing less, remember that!